Exactly 30 days from right now, the mighty Cardinals of Louisville will open their 2016 football season against the Charlotte 49ers inside Papa John’s Cardinal Stadium.
The last few weeks of the endless dead period always seem to be the toughest, and even though 30 is a much more manageable number to deal with than, say, 100, it’s still a fairly sizable amount of time to kill. That being said, here are 20 things (many submitted by you) to do in the Derby City to get you from today to Sept. 1.
1. Read the entire first half of the Cardinal Countdown series again.
2. Play golf, drink 1,000 beers, play golf and drink 1,000 beers at the same time. Make up a story about this one time where you played in a scramble with Jonathan Huffman. Watch as everyone you’re playing with starts treating you as a demigod.
3. I’ve still never been to this place, but I haven’t driven by it once when there hasn’t been a line almost out into the street. And yes, their social media presence is significant.
Go to Steel City Pops everyday for 50 days and have 50 different Instagram posts about it https://t.co/g7wWsExn0l
— Andrew Hebert (@andrewheeb) July 13, 2016
4. This is like seven things, but we’re going to count it as one.
@CardChronicle belle of Lousivlle, Frazier museum, slugger museum, derby museum, Ali center, speed museum, bats game, LCFC match…
— Brandon condra (@condrab) July 13, 2016
5. Use your turn signal when turning right onto Westport Rd. after crossing the railroad tracks in St. Matthews. Because if you don’t you’re an awful human being.
6. Seems like a cool new venture.
@CardChronicle follow ‘@startingwithlou‘ on Instagram and read a new story about a different person in the city of Louisville every day!
— Turner Mayton (@tmayton16) July 13, 2016
7. Don’t tweet at recruits. Don’t do it.
Also, don’t jump in the baby pool.
8. It’s crazy to me that Lazer Blaze has had a monopoly on the laser tag game in Louisville for so long. I’m still waiting for a competitor to emerge.
@CardChronicle play laser tag
— James Brandon King (@KingJamesB) July 13, 2016
9. Go to a local high-end men’s clothing store and simply tell them that you want “the Rocco Gasparro.”
10. Old Villen videos. They’re still out there if you look hard enough.
11. He was, but watch it long enough that you convince yourself that he wasn’t.
@CardChronicle Watch Rutgers/UofL 2006 JFK-style to determine if William Gay was really offsides.
— David Harten (@David_Harten) July 13, 2016
Or just watch his TD celebration and trolling John Calipari videos instead.
12. For legal purposes, I can’t condone this.
@CardChronicle run red lights
— pike mence (@VT_Ben) July 13, 2016
13. Play tennis under the lights at Seneca Park. Laugh at the taking it way too seriously dude next to you who consistently shoots “too good” after his buddy hits an easy passing shot.
14. The man knows his meats.
@CardChronicle listen to @ThatBoysGood talk about smokin meats
— Phil Caballeros (@PhilCaballeros) July 13, 2016
15. Attend open practice tomorrow and write a 10,000 word fan post on the significance of what you saw. Don’t be worried that you’re overreacting. We’ve all been deprived of football for the same amount of time. We’ll all understand.
16. I bet Michael Bush has a game.
@CardChronicle well i watched the 2004 Liberty Bowl on youtube the other day. so do that a few hundred more times
— car crash mutant (@RealTrillBill) July 13, 2016
17. Justify drinking at seemingly inappropriate times as “tailgating for Charlotte.”
18. Obviously.
@CardChronicle make penis jokes.
— Milk Sandwich (@milk_sandwich) July 13, 2016
19. Current International League Player of the Month Scott Schebler isn’t going to be patrolling the outfield at Slugger Field forever.
@CardChronicle don’t wish away baseball season so frivolously. There are 26 more home games for the Bats before football.
— Josh Gumm (@joshgumm) July 13, 2016
20. Go find Nic Cage and tell him you loved him in Adaptation. I hear he’s around here somewhere.
21. Everyone in this city has a bias. Don’t get tricked into thinking any differently.
@CardChronicle get mad at the local media for favoring UK over UL or UL over UK
— Andrew Phelps (@dewyulsc) July 13, 2016
22. Say “Cards just scored” any time you hear a train whistle. It never gets old. Ever. People will hoist you on their shoulders and carry you around as they continue to cackle. Every time.
23. I have never hunted for the goatman. I hope I’m not missing out.
@CardChronicle Ali museum, people watch on baxter avenue, hunt for the goatman, trolly hop on fridays,
— Nick (@NickCWhitworth) July 13, 2016
24. Another obviously.
@CardChronicle listen to R and R and memorize everything Mike says.
— steve (@Hammond1Steve) July 13, 2016
25. Go through the archives and relive the “Bring Chicken to the Bucket” magic that defined the glorious summer of 2011.
26. Spend one work week watching all five of Louisville’s most recent wins over Kentucky during actual work hours. You won’t get in trouble. That’s a CC guarantee.
27. Two words: Mike Linnig’s.
28. I’ll cop to being way more emotionally invested in the squad after James O’Connor’s majestic rant over the weekend.
@CardChronicle Go to Louisville City games at Slugger Field.
— Lawrence Dockery (@ldock93) July 13, 2016
29. Say “yes and yes” to someone on the street. If they don’t respond with “dick,” then they don’t matter.
30. Re-stock the Cardwear wardrobe. We’re a month away from 2016-17 being here and you can’t re-use the tired looks you wore out during the ACC debut season. Treat yourself and then wow your tailgate crew on Sept. 1.